So, since the last time I posted, I could say a lot as happened but yet a lot hasn't. To start things off with- while driving to EDA- i got in a pretty big car accident. Thank god no one in either car was hurt. BUT, that left me with no car for a good two days. I've been driving since i've been 16 so of course it was weird having my mom pick me up, drop me off, etc. But i was pretty startled by the car accident.I initially lost a lot of weight in the middle of the month and was at my lowest weight but then once day I gained like 5 lbs and haven't been able to get rid of it. But, at this point, i don't care anymore. I'm just going to try and let it go. I don't know how well that will work, but good bye ED? for now? i don't know. It's still hard to not just not eat when it's a habit. I used too many double negatives dammit. It's easy to just not eat when it's a habit ( there we go ) even if I'm not trying to lose.
My borderline is acting up a lot right now because I have 3 sessions left with my therapist and only 2 EDA meets left here. I've grown attached of course and I've seen my current therapist the longest out of all of the 3 other therapists I connected with and saw. I'm pretty sure she knows me the best in some aspects and in others Nancy/Amy might know me better. I don't know. I just know leaving is going to be REALLY hard. REALLY REALLY hard and I'm scared Shitless. I better get a hug. lol
xoxo -Lisa
Well hope you get that hug! Lol. Change is always scary and you seem to always have some sort of change going on back to back.
ReplyDeleteHmmm, a scary life. :) which you are doing great wading throug imo.