If you could go back in time (before your addiction/disorder) what would you tell yourself?

What would I tell myself? I would tell myself one thing

• Feeling are ephemeral, so is life. We’re here one moment and we’re gone the next. If you keep living trying to protect yourself, nothing is every going to touch you. 

I've actually been struggling quite a bit recently- it's a hard hole to get out of. I feel so helpless and useless to those around me that are also struggling.I want to fix things- I want to help others, but I know I can't. That's painful for me. I am so angry at this disorder and how much it sucks out of beautiful intelligent people. I just want to like myself and not feel so lonely and stuck in my own head. I want to be alone but yet I want someone to be with me.

I'm so damn tired of fighting this battle. I feel like I can't do it anymore- I refuse to go back to treatment- I'm theraparized out. I'm sick of intensive therapy but it would be nice to feel "safe" again- to feel like I am being taken care of and to now have to worry about all the complicated parts of growing up.

In the last year- my life has changed so much. However, that just reminds me- things are always changing- nothing is permanent. Good things are permanent but yet that means bad things also aren't permanent. Life is always changing. 

For everyone out there that's struggling with something- hang in there. Please don't give up.

xoxo -Lisa