Amy and Nancy were absolutely floored when I opened up and told them about my blog. They hated what I was doing and said it was hindering my recovery- well I beg to differ. I think the community on here is amazing and on top of that- being able to type and communicate my feelings in words to others ( especially the people I have isolated from because I can't really explain how I feel in person ) really helps. But, it is about time for me to update. ( video blog link-click ).
I went res at Rosewood for 32 days. My opinion... was that it helped. I don't really want to say much more about the program- well it was a 12 step program and that didn't sit with me too well. I do know the program has heped A LOT of people and it did have some great aspects in it.
Nancy dropped me as a client and I had to leave Amy as well because they wanted me to go to Menniger or McLean- places that specialize in bpd. I instead went somewhere that does ED. Insurance kind of chose that route for me- insurance also chose the route of kicking me out the day I was reviewed. Let me go through the last week with y'all.
Monday- finds out my insurance cut me off from Rosewood
Tuesday- fly back to Atlanta
Wednesday- did my intake at Ridgeview in Atlanta, found out they want me PHP and won't take me IOP and my insurance refused to approve them as well. Nancy called and I cried on the phone but explained how I felt. It was really nice to get that out
Thursday- saw Nancy for the last time- not for a session, just to say good-bye. She asked ME for a hug :) AND told me that the fact that I reached out and tried to put closure to the situation meant the world to her.
Friday-saw Amy to say goodbye because it was decided that I was going to move to Denver Saturday
Saturday- IN DENVER!!!
Sunday- walked around the area where I am currently staying. 16 days until K and I can move into our apartment!!!!! I also got to go to a place called Canvas and Cocktails!! It was great. I love love love paiting.
Monday- Did EIOP ( evening- extended intensive outpatient ) at the ERC's outpatient location
Tuesday- going to go see a psych in a few hours today.
With all of this going on , the only time I've had to think was yesterday in group...it reminded me how hard groups are and how hard it is to eat with people around. I almost couldn't finish 100%.
I need more support- I need PHP I think. I've been restricting... :-/ It's just so hard not to when I'm not being held accountable but i'm trying- I've been working really hard to try and eat 3 meals a day and some snacks. I have good days and bad days but I wish I had more support- but the program here is trying to help me with that. So far this week, I see someone everyday
Tuesday- psych
Wed- therapist, group
Thursday- dietician, group
Friday- therapist
Hopefully this will be my schedule everyweek.
Alright- enough of an update... I wish my life were more interesting than my ED and how hard IT FUCKING IS
xoxo -Lisa
I went res at Rosewood for 32 days. My opinion... was that it helped. I don't really want to say much more about the program- well it was a 12 step program and that didn't sit with me too well. I do know the program has heped A LOT of people and it did have some great aspects in it.
Nancy dropped me as a client and I had to leave Amy as well because they wanted me to go to Menniger or McLean- places that specialize in bpd. I instead went somewhere that does ED. Insurance kind of chose that route for me- insurance also chose the route of kicking me out the day I was reviewed. Let me go through the last week with y'all.
Monday- finds out my insurance cut me off from Rosewood
Tuesday- fly back to Atlanta
Wednesday- did my intake at Ridgeview in Atlanta, found out they want me PHP and won't take me IOP and my insurance refused to approve them as well. Nancy called and I cried on the phone but explained how I felt. It was really nice to get that out
Thursday- saw Nancy for the last time- not for a session, just to say good-bye. She asked ME for a hug :) AND told me that the fact that I reached out and tried to put closure to the situation meant the world to her.
Friday-saw Amy to say goodbye because it was decided that I was going to move to Denver Saturday
Saturday- IN DENVER!!!
Sunday- walked around the area where I am currently staying. 16 days until K and I can move into our apartment!!!!! I also got to go to a place called Canvas and Cocktails!! It was great. I love love love paiting.
Monday- Did EIOP ( evening- extended intensive outpatient ) at the ERC's outpatient location
Tuesday- going to go see a psych in a few hours today.
With all of this going on , the only time I've had to think was yesterday in group...it reminded me how hard groups are and how hard it is to eat with people around. I almost couldn't finish 100%.
I need more support- I need PHP I think. I've been restricting... :-/ It's just so hard not to when I'm not being held accountable but i'm trying- I've been working really hard to try and eat 3 meals a day and some snacks. I have good days and bad days but I wish I had more support- but the program here is trying to help me with that. So far this week, I see someone everyday
Tuesday- psych
Wed- therapist, group
Thursday- dietician, group
Friday- therapist
Hopefully this will be my schedule everyweek.
Alright- enough of an update... I wish my life were more interesting than my ED and how hard IT FUCKING IS
xoxo -Lisa
I can't even keep up with what all the heck you've been doing, my sweet. But it all sounds like good stuff, so lets just keep fightin that good fight... mkay??
ReplyDeleteAlso, eff people who don't like this blog. (Not really, but basically that means just don't listen to em!) If you like it, and it aint ED or BPD or pills or whatever the hell else, then it aint nothing wrong with it! Esp since you are either usually venting or being positive.
I miss
1. talking to you
2. at least keeping up with you
But i'm thrilled you're getting help. Maybe even some help that will actually HELP you and your beautiful self that is all over the place, and perfectly so at that.
I loves you. Always. Even if we never ever see each other in person again, I am always here and encouraging you... thank goodness for the internet. And for friends.
Cort <3
Wow, look at all that I've missed. A LOT!! I need to keep reading...
ReplyDelete