"Bear in mind you have a life to live. There is an incredible loss. There is a profound grief. And there is, in the end, after a long time and more work than you ever thought possible, a time when it gets easier." -Marya Hornbacher

Monday, May 16, 2011

Trip to the ATL

So I'd been planning a trip to ATL in June...and now- I'm not quite sure if I should postpone it. I really want to see my friends down there and I really want to see Amy but the entire trip is going to cost me close to $400 which is kinda all I have in my bank account...

I WANT to see my friends and I WANT to go- I just don't know if it'll send me into a panic and depression because I want to be there so badly- I'm scared of that part. I'm actually terrified that I just won't want to leave once I'm down there... even though I have to...but yet I WANT TO GO--- I'm just scared...

I'm scared it will bring up old things, but it could always help...I don't know. opinions?

xoxo -Lisa
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8 comments:

  1. middle childMay 16, 2011 at 10:14 PM

    The only opinion I have is that you have to have plans 1,2 and 3. You are saying there's a possibility that you won't want to leave there? That is a big negative unless it's doable. If you fear the trip, know that it IS ok to turn around and come right back. It is hard to do emotionally scary things and when I was having issues like that (my daughter does too), I always had to have a back-up plan. (escape route.) Your behavior may confuse others but there are those of us who understand. Take care of you! Hugs.

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  2. Borderline LilMay 17, 2011 at 3:29 AM

    In my opinion, the money issue is secondary to the emotional and physical impact. I think going back could be a positive event, even healing if you deal with old issues or feelings, but just make sure you are feeling strong enough to deal. I'd hate for you to get there and suffer or be in pain. I say go for it, as long as you feel healthy enough to revisit the past (and to say goodbye at the end of the trip).

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  3. SairsMay 17, 2011 at 4:27 AM

    I agree with Lil, go if you think you can go and come back okay and once you make your decision, know that you will have to accept it. Good luck in deciding.
    *hugs*
    Sarah

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  4. AnonymousMay 17, 2011 at 11:56 AM

    Hm. I'm not the kind of person that gets triggered by places or anything like that, so maybe my opinion is not that valuable in this situation. My suggestion (for what it's worth) is to make a list of pros and cons and see which side holds more weight. It sounds like there are positives and negatives about going to ATL, so maybe that would be helpful. But of course, it's your decision in the end!

    Thank you so much for your kind words on my last post! It really means a lot to me.

    Wishing you well,
    NOS

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  5. AnonymousMay 17, 2011 at 4:46 PM

    Hey dude I just wanted to say that if you want to go, Atlanta isn't going anywhere any time soon, and you can take your time. Make sure that you know there is no real pressure to pack up and brave re-visiting Atlanta immediately. Take your time and when you feel comfortable that you can not only handle it, but that you will get the trip and the memories that you would want out of it, then you should take a deep breath and make the journey. Don't leave if you feel more doubt than confidence. I know you would want to be able to enjoy the chance to see your friends again without being overtaken by memories and nostalgia that you would rather not have looming over you the whole time.
    No matter what is going on in your life, it's an emotional challenge to go back to places that are crammed full of memories. I understand what Atlanta means to you and what going back there entails. I know you can handle it and your friends would love to see you, but make sure that YOU know you can handle it before you spend the last of your money on the trip. I'll be back in Atlanta at the beginning of July; let me know if you are going to be there then.

    Love you and you're still in my thoughts : )
    -T

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  6. PTCMay 17, 2011 at 7:40 PM

    What about moving back there??

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  7. MJMay 17, 2011 at 9:11 PM

    hope you'll come!!! but that's me being really selfish. (then again, i won't be back in the atl until the end of august.) but in all honesty, if you're having any hesitation about NOT coming then maybe you should hold off a bit longer. (especially if one of your hesitations has to do with your fear about your past and what your visit may bring back up. i love you and i want you to enjoy atlanta -- not be hurt by your memory of it. when you feel confident about your place in your recovery, then i think you'll be more prepared to go back to atlanta. if you hold out, i think you'll enjoy the trip all the more. but no matter what you decide, life will go on :) love youuuuuuuu

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  8. katherineMay 18, 2011 at 9:37 AM

    i think it depends on if you're nervous or scared...if you take some time an idea will come to you :) but if you feel like your making progress now, maybe you should hold off? but i'm very bias, i've been dying to see you :D

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