"Bear in mind you have a life to live. There is an incredible loss. There is a profound grief. And there is, in the end, after a long time and more work than you ever thought possible, a time when it gets easier." -Marya Hornbacher

Sunday, May 29, 2011

i feel oddly functional...

...and I'm not doing so well eating disorder wise...but I feel totally functional. that makes me even more on the fence about recovery. ALSO- fml- boundaries. I hate them. My current t never emailed me back and it hurt so much that she didn't. Amy was late in responding to an email too so that hurt as well on top of A( my t ) not responding to my email and she probably never will. I had to cry in hysterics for her to offer me her work email address.

...things are just so different treatment wise. I don't really want to move forward treatment wise from where I am right now bc I feel fine.

xoxo -Lisa
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5 comments:

  1. AnonymousMay 29, 2011 at 7:35 PM

    I can understand that you wouldn't want to move forward because you are comfortable. I've been there. But I've been told that there's something better than comfortable-- that there's a good somehow. My hope is that you don't settle for a life with an eating disorder and that you do what you can to get to good. You deserve a lot more than what an eating disorder can give you.

    Wishing you well,
    NOS

    ReplyDelete
  2. JCMay 29, 2011 at 11:43 PM

    Hey Lisa, I just wanted to let you know that you can still subscribe to my feeds. See the post I wrote about it ... http://extraordinary-jane.blogspot.com/2011/05/quick-note.html
    If it still doesn't work, let me know, but it should work! :) Thanks babe. xo

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousMay 30, 2011 at 12:41 AM

    I also struggle with boundaries issues. In fact, I have a shirt that says "boundaries, boundaries..." that I've worn to therapy many times in the past. I also felt similarly the other day when my therapist didn't respond to my text right away. *sigh* Wishing you all the best! *hugs*

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  4. Nic May 30, 2011 at 4:16 AM

    Yes, I am here! Hello sweetie, I lost you for a while and found you again a few days ago. My fault, I was a bit slow! Keep fighting for that complete recovery. I have every faith you can do it. Lots of love xxx

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousMay 31, 2011 at 9:11 AM

    Normality happens to even the craziest of us...lol. Enjoy it while it last. I am sorry your still struggling with boundaries. I used to have that tendency but you learn over time. But then again I am not borderline so I am not fully aware of how severe the boundary issues lay. Thank you for your kind comment to my marriage post.

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"Feeling are ephemeral, so is life. We’re here one moment and we’re gone the next. If you keep living trying to protect yourself, nothing is every going to touch you."